This talk discusses techniques and philosophy for making oncall more humane / reasonable. We will discuss terminology, how to sort through "alert overload," suggestions for tooling to help, and processes you can put in place to get development & management on board. This comes from years of taking over a managing various oncall services for different architectures, often from extreme states of disrepair. With more than 15 years of experience building database-backed, internet-based systems, Robert currently spends his days as CEO of OmniTI, a technical services firm focused on helping clients with web application and infrastructure management at scale. Author and speaker at conferences worldwide, Robert is a recognized expert within the industry on topics such as Open Source, databases, and managing web operations at scale. He occasionally blogs at xzilla.net.