Security Vibe Check: Which Malware Are You?

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Presented at KawaiiCon 2025 by

Okay, besties, real talk. Your code’s dependencies? They’re giving… chaotic energy. Like, are you even SBOMing? 💅 We’ve all seen the drama. log4j? xz utils? Straight-up trauma. But like, where do you land on the security spectrum? Are you accidentally downloading typosquatted packages because you’re living your best, most chaotic life? Or are you a security queen, catching backdoors before they even exist? ✨ This talk is basically a giant vibe check for your security habits. We’re gonna do a quick, brutal quiz – think ‘are you the drama?’ but for your code – and find out which iconic supply chain meltdown matches your energy. We’ll spill the tea on real-world attacks, from the ‘oops, that’s a backdoor’ to the ‘someone’s running Doom on Minecraft servers again’ level. And we’ll give some practical advice on how to have good security posture. Stretch, queen! If your security is giving ‘main character energy’ (and not in a good way), you need to be here. Let’s level up our security game, avoid becoming the next trending security disaster, and maybe even get some clout for actually knowing when lockfiles actually help. 😉 TL;DR: Quiz, memes, securi-tea. 🫖 Don’t be a vulnerability.